P2YL | 18. My 'one small step' for womankind
Getting over a memory that holds you back
Is there a place or situation which you avoid because it is linked to too many painful memories?
I’ve struggled with that. But at some stage in the heartbreak-healing process, I began to feel the urge to develop a coping process, or this avoidance might hold me back as a woman who wanted to live life fully.
I don't think of myself as a very brave or strong person, so instead of trying to psyche myself up to be really tough, I used mental tricks and distractions and a touch of gallows humour to get me through.
Could this be a useful technique for dealing sneakily with stuff we thought we couldn’t?
My backstory
My first husband was an airline pilot and I loved flying and travelling with him. I grew fascinated by the world of aviation, researching and writing a
magazine article on the elegant British aviatrix Sheila Scott.
Initially struck by Sheila Scott's personal elegance, what impressed me even more when I read her biography was the fact she wasn't a natural pilot, it didn't come easily to her, and she had to struggle with nerves and fears, especially to start with. I could relate to that.
Then, years into the marriage, when my pilot husband (***Cliché Alert***) fell foul of an air hostess and left me for her, I felt I never wanted to fly or go near an airport again.
When I told that to my plain-speaking father, he took his pipe out of his mouth and said shortly, ‘You’ll have to get over that. Or you’ll never travel.’
Sometimes being told a brusque truth does you more good than being sympathised with.
Chocks away...?
So, a few years post-divorce I wrote in my diary:
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'Rising above' those who might hurt you
Bless all the dear little cabin and flight crew, I told myself. They are simply anonymous service industry workers whose job it is to get me to my destination safely. Personally, they’re nothing to me.
The results on the day?
Did it work? I’ll share what happened in a later instalment.
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