P2YL | 58. Five ways my Part 2 wedding differed from Part 1

4) Frocks and locks for a September bride

Age is a gift. 

It means you are rich in years. It recreates you as a woman of experience.

That includes clothes and the way you style yourself. 

It’s an asset.

For me, both weddings and, by implication, both stages of my life — Part 1 and Part 2 — have made me assess how to learn to make the best of myself physically.

June bride (Part 1) to September bride (Part 2)

First time round, I knew nothing about weddings. 

I had never been a ‘girly girl’, daydreaming of what she would look like in a wedding dress.

I had no idea and no experience in occasion dressing and felt I lacked any glam factor.

Thank God for books, for information (this was pre-Internet). If you can read and you have the will, you can learn.

My Part 1 & Part 2 challenges — and their fixes 

Facial acne (acne rosacea?)

I’ve had oily, acne-prone skin since I was 13. I still have it aged 61. 

Part 1 wedding fix: a series of twice-weekly tanning sessions for six weeks prior to the wedding day evened out my facial skintone and cleared up excess sebaceous oil.

Part 2 wedding fix: I’ve long foresworn tanning and today use daily SPF50+ mixed with tinted moisturiser on my face to protect my skin and give myself a little healthy glow.

One compensation that you don’t realise when you are a spotty despairing teenager is that oily skin ages well. 

As well as this, science continually moves on and these days I’m grateful to have a much clearer skin thanks to a small regular dose of isotretinoin prescribed by a dermatologist.

Bodyshapes

Considered underweight in my earlier days and with a straight-up-and-down figure, someone once compared me to a pencil.

A friend at university looked me up and down in my jeans and said, 'Those are not childbearing hips.'

Part 1 wedding fix: I chose a dress with a cinched-in bodice and a crinoline worn under the skirt to create a more curvaceous flow.

Puffed lace sleeves enhanced my narrow shoulders and thin arms, and a simply cut, high neckline filled in with lace disguised a rather bony, flat chest.

Part 2 wedding fix: By now, I was about 2.5 stone heavier. 

My boobs and hips were bigger. 

I had a spare tyre and bigger tummy. 

This time I chose a high-waisted, faux wrap-dress from Phase Eight (£75). 

The high waist draws attention away from the stomach and a wrap-dress hints at an hour-glass contour.

As a tribute to being ‘a woman rich in years and life-experience’ I wore Swarovski jewelry at my neckline and in the same vein, the black lacy tights were a nod to the traditional wedding lace. 

By now I had also realised the benefits of a push-up bra when you are no longer 27 and a 34B.



To keep an overall trimmer look, I made an effort to hold myself tall and straight, and to use my stomach-muscles.

Thin, fine, mousey hair

Part 1 wedding fix: Told as a child that my hair was too fine to wear long, I had years of haircuts that have been variously described as ‘crash helmet’, ‘swish-curtain’, and ‘mullet’.

I felt I could do better so once I was living in a city and earning my first proper salary, I made it my business to find the best hairdresser I could afford and he cut my hair into a stylish, neat bob with a fringe.

It suited me but it wasn’t perfect for keeping a bridal veil and flower coronet in place on my Part 1 wedding day and my fringe looked untidily plastered down on my forehead by the headdress:

At the time I had no idea you could book a professional wedding hairdresser to come for a run-through in advance and then on the day itself to ensure a less amateurish and more groomed appearance.

Part 2 wedding fix: Thankfully, you get more style-savvy with the years. 

I had also grown my hair, which gave me more styling options.

And then there was this wonderful, new resource for which I will always be grateful, called The Internet.

Suddenly at the click of a mouse you could search easily — ask for recommendations on Facebook — read reviews and look at websites — to find a skilful hairdresser practised in doing wedding day hair and accessories.

Second time round my appearance was less ingénue and more polished.

In conclusion

At my first wedding, I had youth and unshakeable conviction.

At my second, I felt more like a seasoned soldier in the battles of life, humbled and deeply grateful for being given this new chance to love and be loved. 

In between I had learnt not to give up.

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